When I was in Dallas all those years I say BAJITO ONDA is dedicated to the throw aways. But when I was trying to tell people that God had spoken to me and told me not to go and kill innocent people they just laughed at me, and it crushed me to no end. What had given me a purpose in my once useless life was now being made fun of by people standing there judging me and doing not any thing about anything. Let alone, sitting down with violent rage filled cold hearted criminals and telling them what would they think if I told them - THEM - that God has spoken to me and told me to open my heart to others like me and ask them to calm their heart and mind of rage because ‘together - us abandoned, unwanted, rejected hopeless failures and losers in society if we come together to form our own family we can change our world and our futures. I had seen a gun as a key back into a cell for as many decades as the crime called for and as luck would have it. I had already chosen the prison job I wanted and what prison I wanted to be shipped out to. I had already given up on my sellout mother and sister and on anything I called friend before I fell to prison so really why would I even want to sit down with another loser and try to speak to their hearts and heads and try to even reach out to give them a hug.
I was dying for a hug. Prison touch is taboo and will send you to the lockup isolation hole for months on end if you are even seen touching someone anywhere. NO TOUCH EVER. It took me five years to ever be touched even on my arm without it feeling like sandpaper and like I was violating the very core of all things human turned convict. Everything began to live out all the shit they programmed us for inside before our release. That forevermore we would have our prison number shining first and foremost for everyone to see in our try for a ‘new life’ in the so called FREE-world.